too much air conditioning
Today was no different than the last few days but today... today... i feel different...
I am not in a great mood, I don’t feel very well, and I am realizing that I think I was just not meant to work... at all...
I think I am on the bad end of a shift of presuppositions as well. People say that when you’re a teenager and in your early twenties that you think you are invincible. I don’t remember ever feeling truly invincible—I think I was a little too grounded for that but recently even ounce of that seems to be gone.
I quietly notice everything that could go wrong. Like hum… I could have just really hurt myself right there. Or oh, I could have crashed my car and been in a wreck… or, my dog/cat could get hit by a car… All kinds of odd morbid things. I am starting to realize that there is no “us and them” difference between myself and others who are killed or injured… I hold no special place apart from “them.”
It is kind of a creepy way to go through life… hopefully this will pass as well.

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